BY JEFF CORBETT
A tired businessman who wanted to get away from it all went to a retreat at a famous old monastery. As he was signing in, he asked an elderly monk if it was all right to smoke while praying.
The wise old monk replied, “Absolutely not!”
“Well, then,” asked the businessman, “is it all right to pray while you are smoking?”
“Absolutely,” said the monk.
It’s More than Just Words
The moral of that story: When you want to succeed, it is critically important that you know how to phrase your proposition or idea.
Words well spoken are one of the most powerful tools you will ever have. The right words make you memorable, give oomph! to your message, and signify that you are full of life and passion for what you believe and what you do.
Every so often I enjoy listening to country music for the colorful words, titles, and lyrics that make it so entertaining.
Even if you’re not a country music fan, think back to some song titles that made you chuckle. Here are some of my favorites:
♦ My Wife Ran Off with my Best Friend and I Sure Do Miss Him;
♦ I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim is Getting Better;
♦ I Bought the Shoes That Just Walked Out on Me; and
♦ We Used to Kiss on the Lips, But It’s All Over Now
These lyrics are simple and direct, easy to identify with, and rich in emotions and feelings. Your conversations that are greatly enjoyed and remembered by others should be very much the same.
Words are Persuasive
An interesting use of wording in a computer advertisement caught my eye. The product descriptions have laptop specifications such as weight, width and depth.
But they go one step further.
They use a measure called “thinness.” They don’t say how thick it is, they say how thin it is. You visualize it being thin, making it a most desirable laptop feature.
It’s a shift of perspective that makes the product much more appealing to the consumer.
Words Sell
You don’t buy beef that’s 30 percent fat, you buy beef that’s 70 percent lean. Do you prefer “Super-Sized” (You pig!) or “Value-Sized?” (You frugal, smart consumer!)
Have you ever received an offer that promised a free gift? Let me ask you this: What other kind of gift is there?
Words Can Be Twisted
There are multiple ways to say things, so be sure what you say puts you in a good light. Don’t call someone and say you are “running late.” Say you are “behind schedule.”
Being late sounds irresponsible and indicates that perhaps you don’t value that person’s time.
It’s understandable that busy, productive people who plan their day sometimes do get behind.
Two “trigger words” to use cautiously are “assume” and “but.”
You know what “assume” does to you and me. Again, it implies sloppiness and not taking time to get the facts.
Instead, say “It was my impression that …” or “It is my understanding that …”
When you say “I would love to go to the beach with you, but…”, the next thing you say will be the opposite of the first part.
Instead of “but,” use “however.”
Don’t Mess With Texas
Andy Goodman, from Los Angeles, is a seasoned author and writer for TV shows, and I once attended one of his seminars.
Since 1999, he’s published a great newsletter called “Free-Range Thinking,” and in a past issue he tells of how the phrase “Don’t Mess with Texas” was born.
In 1985, the Texas DOT wanted to impact the growing litter problem, so they hired an ad agency with a goal of reducing litter by 5 percent in a year.
Featuring singer Stevie Ray Vaughn, the ad campaign cut litter by 29% that year!
To better understand their target audience, the ad agency wisely did its homework before committing to a plan. What they discovered was that Texans didn’t think littering was that bad, and they thought someone would clean up after them.
Hence, the slogans “Please Don’t Litter” and “Keep Texas Clean” fell flat and never moved the needle.
The ad agency also drilled into the research to see that the worst littering group was young men, age 18 to 34. What phrase would appeal to this group’s macho self-image, as they sped down Interstate 10, tossing an empty beer bottle out of their pick-up truck window?
“Don’t Mess with Texas” was perfect, and was an incredible success story, with littering reduced by 70%, according to Goodman.
Choose the words that work best for whatever situation and audience you have.
If you fail to understand your listeners’ behaviors, needs and desires, your words will bounce off their brains and fall to the ground at your feet, dead and lifeless.
Paint Pictures
Visualizations are especially powerful to take your conversations to the next level, and here’s why: When you tell a story, your listener turns what you’re saying into a movie in their mind; they visualize in pictures what’s being described.
When you need to persuade someone to do, buy, or try something, paint a picture in their mind of them doing what you propose, and that person “sees” and visualizes themselves happier, more successful, 10 pounds thinner, whatever your goal is for them to do.
A friend of mine, a jeweler, used visualization to sell a gorgeous engagement ring to a young man planning to propose at a New Year’s Eve event.
As he held the ring, she asked him to “Imagine this … it’s been a wonderful night in an absolutely gorgeous setting, with music, over-the-top food, dancing, and all kinds of festivity. It’s time for the ball to drop, and as it does, you go to one knee and offer this stunning ring to her. Can you imagine the look on her face, and imagine what’s going in her mind, after an ecstatic evening you two will never forget.”
He bought the ring on the spot, and came back later to thank her profusely for a priceless engagement.
As Rudyard Kipling was fond to say, “Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.”
Use yours wisely and well, and success and good things will seek you out.
Jeff Corbett is an experienced public speaker, meeting facilitator and sales and marketing professional. He lives in Statesville. He can be reached at jeff@speak-well.com.